翻译：@黑路易
Catarina.
卡特琳娜
Catarina.
卡特琳娜
Catarina.
卡特琳娜
Renato! Open the door! Open it, dude!
雷纳多! 快开门! 开门!
Open the door!
快开门!
Renato! Somebody help!
雷纳多! 救命啊!
What's happening to you?
你怎么了?
Got you all scared, didn't ? I was just kidding.
把你吓到了是不是? 我开玩笑的
Fuck you, man!
去你的吧!
I was just kidding, man. Look, it's ketchup.
我闹着玩的 这是番茄酱
This gang is fascinated by the idea
这一伙人坚信
that there are more things in heaven and earth
天堂与人间之中存在着
than are dreamt of in our philosophy.
远超我们想象之物
- Is anyone there? - f you can hear me, scream!
-有人吗? -如果听到就尖叫!
What started just as goofing around became serious business for this crew.
当初的胡闹现在已成为这个团队的严肃工作
From this point on, I'm not responsible for anyone's life.
现在起 我无法保证任何人的安全
I have a gift. They call me the Brazilian chico Xavier.
我有一种天赋 他们都说我是巴西通灵大师
I hope this is an arm.
但愿这是只手
卡洛琳 -灵媒 技能：感知力 塔罗
Unfortunately, I can't simply buy a gun and shoot ghosts in the face,
真可惜我不能买把枪给鬼魂爆头
so I make nifty gadgets like this one!
于是我做了这样的小道具
杰克-鬼魂工程师 技能：军师 发明家 死灵战士
A strong gust brought this down. I don't think it was natural.
一阵狂风吹过 我认为是有鬼
If you're a ghost, we're coming to hunt you!
如果你是鬼 那我们会来追杀你的!
弗雷德：领队 技能：领导力 勇气
The power of friendship gave them the courage to face the unknown,
友谊的力量给了他们面对未知的勇气
and, together, they will prove that ghosts do exist,
他们会同心协力证明鬼魂的存在
and need to be exterminated.
并将其消灭
We are the ghoulbusters!
我们是打鬼敢死队!
This week, we are visiting a spooky coffee farm from last century,
本周我们将探访一家上世纪的咖啡农场
on the hopes of busting some ghosts!
并希望能消灭到鬼魂!
This is a hanging spirit.
这里有个吊死鬼
They cry a lot, and, since tears are wet...
他们总在哭 泪水湿哒哒的
- This was a slave farm, right? - No, it was a coffee farm.
-这里是个奴隶农场是吗? -不 这是个咖啡农场
Did you hear that?
你听到了吗?
- It's coming from over there! - My god. Oh, my god!
-是从这边来的! -哦我的天啊
Whoa!
哇哦!
Do you see what I'm seeing?
你也看见了吗?
My god!
我的天!
Can the ghoulbusters bust the cursed soul of the ghost of the coffee farm?
打鬼敢死队能成功捉拿咖啡农场的恶鬼吗?
We are in a site full of haunted haunting ghosts,
我们正身处于恶鬼肆虐之地
but I always have these delicious cheese breads
但无论哪股邪恶力量入侵
for whenever the forces of evil attack.
我总会带着可口的奶酪面包
It has that fresh farm taste.
扑鼻的新鲜农场香气
- My god! - Do you see what I'm seeing?
-我的天! -你也看见了吗?
Good god!
天啊!
Coward! Why are you attacking this innocent old lady?
懦夫! 你为何袭击这名无辜的老妇?
Someone who would probably die in a few months anyway?
袭击一名半截已经入了黄土的老人?
- 'm going to get you! - No!
-我要抓到你! -不!
No, he needs help!
不! 他需要帮助!
He doesn't want help. He will be exterminated!
他不需要帮助! 他需要被消灭!
Eat this, jackass!
吃我一炮!
- Hi there, uncle! - Don't you "hi there" me!
-你好 叔叔 -别跟我来这套
How long will you fool around with those bums?
你要跟这几个混混胡闹多久?
Come on, uncle. They're my friends.
别这样 他们都是我朋友
Friends? They're just swindlers!
朋友? 他们就是一群骗子!
You should get yourself a job. A man's job!
你该给自己找份男人的工作!
- Sorry. - Did I ever tell you
-抱歉 -我讲没讲过...
about the ox that fell on top of me?
我被一头公牛压在身下的故事?
- Yes, many times... - Then shut up, I will tell it again.
-讲过好多次了 -那就闭嘴让我再讲一次
So there I was, trying to get this ox, since I worked with them.
当时我想要干掉这头公牛 因为这是我的工作
And then the ox came and fell on top of me!
结果公牛冲过来压在了我的身上
How could I escape? Oxen are heavy!
我要怎么逃脱? 那公牛沉死了
So I balled up my screwdriver like this,
于是我把螺丝刀这样握着
I pierced its hide between its third and fifth ribs,
从它第三和第五根肋骨之间刺穿了牛皮
and made my way through him by ripping out his guts.
一路掏心掏肺地刨了出去
I went through to the other side!
于是我从另一边爬出来了!
Nah, seeing blood makes me sick.
不了吧 我一见血就恶心
You can't see blood, but you have the guts
你见不了血 但是有胆量
to bring those clowns home?
把这帮小丑带进家里?
- We're getting a TV deal. - What channel?
-我们在谈一档电视节目 -哪个频道?
- They haven't said yet. - Probably your ass TV!
-他们还没说 -骗鬼台吧!
I'm here because I respect my clients. It's a man's job!
由于尊重客户我才站在这 这是男人的工作!
I know. =...
-我知道... -你知道吗
I'm always managing things with care.
我为人处世一向细心
And tell your friends this: I used to castrate cattle for a living.
但告诉你朋友 我以前的工作是阉牛
You know what I will do to you all if you don't pay the rent?
如果再不交租 你知道我会做什么吗?
- I will let them know. - You're on the list!
-我会告诉他们的 -你也跑不了!
I will let them know!
我会告诉他们的
Bunch of punks.
一群混混
Dear Christ...
上帝啊...
I don't want to lose my testicles. I like them.
我还不想失去心爱的蛋蛋
Easy there, dog! Easy...
放轻松 狗狗...
Hey, guys.
你们好啊
My uncle just told me that if we don't pay the rent right now,
我叔叔刚说如果我们还不交租
he will kill you three with a butcher knife.
他会拿起屠刀宰了你们三个
Do you think I'd have shown that crap to TV stations if I had money?
你以为我有钱了还会在电视上放这玩意?
Looks like we will stay broke.
看来我们会一直穷下去了
We're making zilch from monetization. Our videos have fewer and fewer views.
我们流量一点没涨 播放量越来越少了
- Our last one had... - Twelve thousand views?
-上一条视频只有... -一万二观看?
- Yeah. - Knew it.
-没错 -我就知道
See this mannix chick? .5 million views.
这个叫Mannix的小妞有一百五十万观看
All she does is play games. We should try that.
不过就打打游戏而已 我们也该试试
We should make gameplay videos of ghost games.
我们应该录一些闹鬼游戏实况
- Those probably don't exist. - They probably do.
-没有那种东西吧 -没准有的
Pac-man! It has ghosts!
吃豆人! 里面有鬼魂
You really don't get what's going on.
你根本是状况外吧
We have to evolve with our viewers. If they grew up, we should do the same.
我们应该和观众共同成长 共同进步
Let's get sophisticated. Like this.
我们该弄得更复杂些 比如这个
I call this baby the precision exo-gauntlet.
这个宝贝叫“精准打击铁拳”
I calibrated its aim myself. I can hit anything at any range. Look.
由我亲自校准 可以命中任何范围内的目标
Take it easy.
小心点
Yeah, clearly it is your making.
行吧 很像你的杰作
It also has a cool function.
它还有个厉害的功能
If you press this button...
如果按这个按钮...
Check out our latest video.
看看我们最新的视频
Already about 20 hate memes from legendary thanos in the comments.
已经被【传奇灭霸】留了二十多条恶评
- Let's see. - Ihate this legendary thanos.
-来瞅瞅 -我恨传奇灭霸
I bet he's some 40-year-old geezer who still wears baseball caps
我敢说他是个四十多岁还戴棒球帽的怪蜀黍
and lives off the web. Must be such a loser.
天天赖在网上 真是个撸瑟
But some of his comments make sense. Like the one about our logo.
但偶尔说得也有道理 比如说我们Logo那条
Our logo really sucks. The ghost looks drunk.
我们的Logo真的丑 那鬼像喝大了
That's why it's cool!
就是丑才酷啊!
- I sketched up a new one. - We're working here.
-我画了幅新的 -我们这搞正事呢
- Just take a look. - It is serious.
-就看一眼呗 -说正经的呢
What else are they saying?
他们还说什么了?
That the best thing in the video are Caroline's boobs.
视频里唯一的高光是卡洛琳的巨乳
- Gross! - Kids will be kids.
-死宅真恶心 -小学生而已
We need to make money fast! Selling that pilot was our only shot.
我们得快点赚钱! 唯一的机会就是拿下试播集
Soon we shall get a call
很快我们会接到一通电话
that will change our lives forever!
会改变我们的一生!
Yeah, right.
想得美
See? I told you so!
看! 我说什么来着
- The phone. Pick up the phone! - Sorry.
-电话! 接电话啊! -抱歉
Ghoulbusters speaking.
打鬼敢死队 请讲
Right. I see.
好的
- Who was it? - Aren't you psychic?
-是谁? -你不是通灵吗?
Shut up, idiot.
闭嘴 白痴
They asked if it was the butcher shop,
他们问这里是不是肉店
I said "yes", and he said:
我说是 他说
"So that's why there's a cow in the window, losers!"
“所以窗前才站着头母牛吗? 败类”
And he hung up.
然后挂断了
- That was a great one! - And done as hell.
-这句挺好笑的 -但是讲得真垃圾
- Let's go have lunch! - Yes.
-我们吃午饭吧 -好的
工作
恶作剧
We will refill our energy once we eat. Also, it's Tuesday, so tulio pays.
吃过饭就能量满满了 而且周二图里奥请客
But it feels like Tuesday, so...
-今天不是周二 -但感觉像周二
Lets go.
我们走吧
Hello?
喂?
I am principal nogueira at Isaac Newton high.
我是艾萨克·牛顿高中的诺圭拉校长
I have a job for you.
我这有个活
Please call me back at...
请回电给...
Ghoulbusters speaking.
这里是打鬼敢死队
Cramped parking spaces, aren't they?
蛋疼的车位 是不是?
I think we bumped another car.
我们好像碰到别的车了
Yeah, we did.
是的 没错
So you are the guys who imitate the ghostbusters.
所以你们几个是模仿捉鬼敢死队的?
No. We don't "imitate" anyone.
不是 我们没在“模仿”任何人
- You don't? - No.
-没有吗? -没有
What about the ghost in the stop sign?
那禁停符号里的鬼魂Logo呢?
That isn't a ghost. It's a ghoul.
那不是鬼魂 是个食尸鬼
What's the difference?
有区别吗?
"What's the difference?” tell him the difference.
还“有区别吗”...给他讲讲区别
There is no difference!
没有区别
Yes, there is.
是有区别的
The difference is that the ghostbusters have a ghost in a no parking sign,
捉鬼敢死队的Logo是禁停标志里一个鬼魂
while ours is in a yield sign.
而我们的是让路标志
So you hunt ghouls, but you yield to ghosts?
那么你们打食尸鬼 但是给鬼魂让路?
- Whose dumb-ass idea was that? - That's what I've...
-这谁想出来的鬼主意? -我也是这么...
Come on.
来吧
- You can't agree with him! - I can't believe this...
-你怎么能赞同他 -我不敢相信...
Sorry, pal.
抱歉 伙计
Not in my school.
我的学校里不许
Not in my school.
我的学校里不许
Back where I lived, we called her the cotton girl.
我们那个年代都叫她【棉球女】
Here, you know her as bloody Mary.
而现在你们熟悉的名字叫【血腥玛丽】
The name doesn't matter. The spirit is the same. A tormented one.
名字无关紧要 都是同一个受尽折磨的灵魂
In order to summon her, you just need to knock three times,
想要召唤她 你只需敲三下门...
flush three times, and call her real name three times.
冲三次水 再叫三次她的真名
And she appears.
她便会现身
Yes, she does. In the bathroom mirror.
她会现身于厕所的镜子中
Blond hair, cotton in her nostrils.
一头金发 鼻孔里堵着棉球
One of our students summoned her. Right here, in this school,
我们一个学生召唤了她 就在这所学校
and that put a curse on this place.
而这为此地降下了诅咒
Did you get that on tape?
这段你录下来了没?
- Did you, tulio? - No! You didn't tell me to!
-录了吗? 图里奥 -没有! 你也没说!
- Come on, man. - You did not tell me to!
-你还能行不 -你也没说啊!
- Now I'm recording. - No need to do that.
-现在我在录了 -不用了
Turn off that piece of crap.
把那玩意关掉
Let's get down to business.
我们谈点正经的
One of our students had a seizure in the bathroom this week.
这星期有个学生在厕所癫痫发作
Now she's in a coma.
现在她陷入昏迷了
Word got around, and we started to worry...
消息传开之后我们开始担心...
I don't think it's an ordinary coma.
我不认为这是一般的昏迷
I really felt a strange energy coming from that bathroom.
我感觉到从那个厕所里传出奇怪的能量
Have you been using the students' toilet again, conan?
柯南? 你又去用学生厕所了吗?
And so, rumors spread. Everyone talking about it.
从此谣言四起 所有人都在传
About how the school being haunted,
传说这个学校闹鬼
the existance of the cotton girl in the bathroom.
还有厕所里棉球女出没的事
And how can we help?
那我们能做什么?
I have a student who's a big fan of your channel.
我有个学生是你们频道的铁粉
We have many of those.
我们有很多铁粉
In our school, I only know one.
在我们学校我只知道一个
The point is: He convinced everyone else and he started this petition
重点是他说服大家发起了一个请愿
asking you to kill bloody Mary.
希望你们杀死血腥玛丽
That's why I brought you here.
这就是叫你们来的原因
So you can do your little shtick, lift the school's spirits,
所以希望你们做场秀 振奋一下学校精神
and lessen the pain of the kid who's in the icu!
也让在重症病房的孩子减轻伤痛
You shouldn't trivialize this, principal nogueira.
诺圭拉校长 这件事不应该大事化小
She guessed my name, and I hadn't told her!
我都没自我介绍她就猜到了我的名字!
- She read the plate on your desk. - What plate?
-她读了你桌上的名牌 -什么名牌?
I didn't even notice he had a name plate!
我没看到他有名牌!
- Look, our job is serious. - We're ghoulbusters.
-我们的工作很严肃 -我们是打鬼敢死队
And digital influencers.
也是网络影响红人
Anyway, what do you want us to do?
总之 你要我们做什么?
It's simple.
很简单
Go to the schoolyard, take a few pictures,
去校园里拍几张照
give the kids autographs, and sign a form saying you killed the ghost.
给孩子们签签名 再签表证明你们杀掉了鬼魂
Everybody's happy and back to class.
大家开开心心回学校复课
Our job isn't as simple as signing sick notes like a doctor.
我们的工作不是像医生开药方那么简单
- We can't agree to... - Let me do the talking, okay?
-我们绝不会同意... -让我来说 行吗?
How much are we in for?
报酬是多少?
How much do we have left from last year's June party?
我们去年聚会结束还剩多少?
A thousand bucks.
几千块吧
Let's raise it a little. Like rs ,500?
我们提点价 比如一千五
So the three can have 500 each.
让他们三个一人五百
We're four, actually! I'm here too.
事实上有四个人 我也在的
Just let him speak.
让他说完
Fifteen hundred. Fifteen hundred.
-一千五 -就一千五
I think so...
我认为...
Deal...
成交
Let's be reasonable and use common sense.
我们讲点道理
The souls of innocent kids are at stake!
这么多无辜的孩童身处风险
You can't put a price on that.
其中的价值是无法衡量的
- Forty thousand. - Excuse me?
-我要四千块 -什么?
Forty thousand.
四千块
Are you crazy, man?
你疯了吗?
We've hired Barney the dino for less than that.
请巴尼恐龙都花不了这么多钱
He brought all of us so much joy.
他给我们带来多少欢乐
Take into consideration that I'm not even charging my usual fee.
请注意我们甚至没按正常价格收费
This is just for the use of special equipment,
这只是使用特殊仪器的费用
special soul fee and overnight stay,
学生特价以及过夜费用
since we will have to stay overnight to investigate this properly.
我们需要在这里过夜以便调查
Forget it! I won't agree to that.
别想了! 我不会同意的
No, sir.
绝不
If a thief breaks into the school, you call the cops.
如果学校里有小偷 可以叫警察
If the school's on fire, you call the firemen.
如果学校里着火了 可以叫消防员
If that teacher there wants to fix that mug of hers,
如果那个老师想要修修脸
you call Dr. 9020.
可以叫医生
But, against the supernatural, you can only count on us.
但是想要对抗超自然 你只能靠我们
Forty thousand or no deal.
四千块 干不干
Are you stupid? Those 5 hundred would've come in handy for me!
你傻逼吗? 我还挺想要那五百块的
No need to be a psychic to see you'd fuck this up.
不用通灵也看得出你玩砸了
I keep asking myself that: If Steve Jobs had a mind as small as yours,
我常常扪心自问：如果乔布斯跟你们一样心胸狭隘
would he have invented the cell phone?
他还发明得出iPhone吗?
- Actually, he didn't invent... - Yes, he did!
-其实并不是他发明... -就是他
Don't panic. That was just a little something that went down.
别慌 这只是个小事故
Just some food poisoning from the cafeteria food.
只是吃食堂食物中毒了
But since we all believe in ghosts here,
但既然我们都相信有鬼
I will receive the devil over a sanitary inspection any day.
随时都会有卫生检察官来向我发难
You're hired.
你们被聘用了
You got yourself a deal. Eighty thousand.
成交 我们要八千
- Fifteen hundred. - Forty thousand.
-一千五 -四万
- Fifteen hundred. - Fifteen thousand.
-一千五 -一万五
- A thousand! - Deal.
-一千爱要不要 -成交
I want you here at seven o'clock in the morning.
我要你们明天早晨七点钟
Then you will walk out that door and give the kids' parents and the press
从大门走出来 当着全校学生家长和媒体
a statement, saying that there's no bloody Mary, no cotton girl,
发布声明宣布这里没有血腥玛丽或者棉球女
no devil, no chupacabra, no nothing.
没有恶灵 没有神秘生物 什么都没有
Chupacabra：传说存在于美洲 以吸食牲畜血为生的神秘生物
I met this teacher just now. An angel in a skirt.
我刚刚遇到一位穿着短裙的美女老师
- Can she stay with us? - Sure!
-她能跟我们一起吗? -当然了
Both her and conan, our security guard.
她和我们的保安柯南
His shoe size is 5.
他的鞋码才5号
And leave the school just the way you found it.
到时候把我的学校原样归还
Clean and organized.
一尘不染
Or else, I will make sure to personally
不然我保证亲自
introduce you and your little pals to Satan himself!
把你和你的小伙伴们介绍给撒旦认识
Just leave it to us!
交给我们吧
I will treat the school as if it were my own house.
我们会把校园当成家一样爱护
Where's the rest of the stuff?
剩下的呢?
I'm coming. Just a second. I'm coming.
我来了 稍等一下
Let's go over the plan!
我们过一遍计划!
When did you catch a shadow around here?
你什么时候看到可疑阴影的?
Fred will collect witness accounts from the teachers.
弗雷德来采访教师证词
Tulio will turn on the projector on the mirror
图里奥会打开投影仪照在镜子上
and warn me when all is ready.
并且在准备好之后告诉我
I will take the teacher to the bathroom, she will be spooked, and we will run.
我会把教师们带到厕所 她会被吓 我们会跑
We will go through the haunted hall, find the ghost, and I will fight it.
我们穿过闹鬼的走廊 找到鬼魂并与其战斗
I will point my exo-ray gauntlet at its head and say:
我会用【精准打击铁拳】瞄准鬼头并说道...
"Eat this, jackass!”
“吃我一炮! ”
What a load of crap.
真是一顿胡扯
- And that catchphrase sucks! - People love the catchphrase!
-而且撂的叫什么狠话 -大家都爱听撂狠话!
We always try your plan, and it always fails.
我们只要按你说的做 最后都会失败
I'm the leader, so let me take the lead, kid.
我是领队 所以由我来领导这个队
Stay quiet. So here's the plan.
安静点 计划是这样的
Jack will turn on the projector on the mirror
杰克去打开镜子那边的投影仪
and warn me when everything's ready.
并且在准备好之后告诉我
I will take the teacher to the bathroom, she will be spooked, and we will run.
我把教师带到厕所 她会被吓 我们会跑
We will go through the haunted hall, find the ghost, and I will face it.
我们穿过闹鬼的走廊 找到鬼魂并与其战斗
We sell this pilot for TV and become rich and famous.
卖出这集试播集然后走向人生巅峰
Eat this, jackass!
吃我一炮吧!
Where do I come in?
那我什么时候出场?
Ask the spirit.
问问灵媒咯
This plan is garbage! It doesn't even have a catchphrase,
这计划真垃圾 连句狠话都没撂
and you will end up being sued for sexual harassment.
另外你会被起诉性骚扰的
Who hasn't been?
谁还没经历过?
Why don't we just try to prove that ghosts do exist?
为什么不直接证明鬼魂存在呢?
Seriously.
说真的
Because we've been trying to do that for 20 years
因为我们已经努力了二十年了
and all we've proven is that people who take ghosts seriously
最终只证明了把鬼当真的人
end up like you,
最后都混成你这样了
a nutcase who talks to herself like a crackhead.
一个自言自语疯疯癫癫的疯子
I mean it, guys.
我是认真的
As long as we got to do this, we might as well do it for our friendship.
既然要做 不如就为了我们的友谊
That is what our opening line says.
我们的开场白就是这么说的
"The power of friendship gave them the courage to face the unknown,
“友谊的魔法给了他们面对未知的勇气”
and, together, they will prove to the world that ghosts do exist
“他们将同心协力证明世间有鬼存在”
and need to be chased...”
“并将其斩尽杀绝”
Well, I was waiting to give you this after we were hired by a TV channel,
本来我打算节目卖出去之后再给你的
but I guess it's okay if we used it in the pilot.
但是用在试播集里应该也行
Dude! That's awesome!
哥们! 这太酷了!
Wow! Real uniforms?
哇哦! 真的有制服?
Seriously, Jackson?
你在逗我吗?
If you had money to order uniforms,
你都有钱定制队服
why didn't you pay my uncle's rent?
但是没钱付我叔叔房租?
What are you, Broadway? Everything's about "rent" with you!
你是百老汇吗? 张口闭口都是《吉屋出租》
Jesus Christ...
天啊...
I paid for these with a loan
这些是我贷款买的
from an entrepreneur who has a lot of faith in our work.
一位对我们怀揣信心的企业家友情赞助
Those good-for-nothing bums!
这帮没用的混蛋!
I got to to admit they do look cool.
我得承认这看起来不错
Don't you have one for me?
有我的吗?
- Yes, you do have a uniform. - Cool!
-你确实有套衣服 -太棒了
Dude, no way.
哥们 别这样
I'm not playing the ghost again!
我不想再演鬼了
Let go of your ego and take this one for the team!
放低姿态 为队伍扛起重任
This is ridiculous! It's the ghost of a 3-year-old girl!
这太可笑了 一个十三岁女孩的鬼魂
I'm a bearded 30-year-old man!
但我是个三十岁的胡子大叔了
You have a point. 3-year-old girls don't have beards.
你说得有道理 花季少女没有胡子的
- Yeah. - Of course they don't.
-没错 -当然没有了
Take this.
拿上这个
So we're all on the same page. Shall we?
我们达成共识了 开始吧?
No. I disagree!
不! 我不同意!
You kidding? I'm not wearing this shit!
你在开玩笑吗? 老娘绝不穿这玩意!
If I wanted to show my boobs, I'd be in a soap opera,
如果我愿意献身 我早就拍肥皂剧去了
not chasing ghosts with you bozos!
谁还跟你们在这捉鬼!
Then you can wear whatever you want.
那你爱穿什么穿什么吧
Can I wear whatever I want?
我能爱穿什么穿什么吗?
- No! - No!
-不行 -不行
Cotton girl? Or bloody...
棉球女? 还是血腥...
Testing sound. One, two, three.
测试 一二三
What a bunch of losers.
真是一群败类
Cotton girl? Bloody Mary?
棉球女? 还是血腥玛丽?
Or simply a myth?
又或者只是传说?
Based on recent happenings in this school,
根据这所学校近期的事件
she appears to be real.
女鬼应该是存在的
That's why we're going to investigate every nook and cranny here
因此我们要找遍这里的每个角落
in search of the real story.
查个水落石出
If you have the guts, come with us.
如果你够胆量 就跟我们来
Are you going to take my statement now?
你准备好记录我的证词了吗?
Actually, I was thinking of interviewing that lady teacher that is more...
事实上我想采访的是另一个老师...
The one that is youn...
更年轻的那个...
Well, but the principal asked me to stay with you tonight.
但是校长今晚让我来陪同你们
Good god!
我的上帝!
Good god...
上帝啊...
- "Good god?" Aren't you an atheist? - Sorry...
-上帝? 你不是无神论者吗? -抱歉...
- Why no cotton in your nostrils? - Yeah, here's the thing.
-你塞鼻孔的棉球呢? -听着 是这样
摄影机离得还挺远的 看不到胡子
The camera is kind of far, it won't really show.
Do 3-year-old girls have beards?
我问你有十三岁少女长胡子的吗?
Do 3-year-old girls have dicks?
那我问你有十三岁少女带把吗?
Just shave it.
你就剃了吧
Fine.
行吧
It was right here, with this axe,
就在这 用这把斧子
that one of our country's most heinous crimes was committed, in 992,
在1992年 我国历史上最令人发指的罪行发生了
and here we've also made contact with the murderer's soul.
而在此我们将于杀手的灵魂建立联系
What you're about to see is frightening,
接下来的内容将极度骇人
scary...
恐怖...
And sickening.
令人作呕
But before you do, smash that like button!
但在作呕之前 请为本视频点赞!
Like, like, like!
点赞! 点赞! 点赞!
These guys are terrible.
这帮人糟糕透了
That is what stupid teenagers like, stupidity other idiots post on YouTube.
现在愚蠢的年轻人就爱看其他愚蠢的白痴犯蠢
Will that horror stuff they're shooting be good?
后来的恐怖桥段会好看吗?
Of course not! They're four idiots making a horror movie.
当然不会了! 四个白痴想拍恐怖电影
教师休息室
they're not even good comedians.
他们甚至不好笑
There's not a single real actor in this.
这视频里没有一个真正的演员
Just look at it, they shoot it all at a single location.
看看吧 这甚至是在同一个地方拍的
They don't have the budget to shoot anywhere nicer, like a flowery park.
他们甚至没钱去好一点的场景拍 比如公园里
At least the principal's paying us.
至少校长会付我们加班费
He promised a bonus to whoever stays to give a statement.
他承诺给留下接受采访的人发奖金
- All I fear is making a fool of myself. - I don't.
-我担心的是我们会出丑 -我可不担心
We are just giving statements. We are like extras.
我们只需要提供证词 像是附加材料
Even if it ends up being crap, it won't hurt my career.
即使最后事情搞砸 也不会影响我的职业
Plus, people say that, in horror movies,
另外人们都说在恐怖电影里
there's always steamy scenes between extras like us.
总会穿插一些我们俩这样的支线剧情
Jack, do you copy?
杰克 听得到吗?
I'm taking Mrs. Helena to the toilet
我要带海伦娜女士去厕所了
to shoot the reenactment and take her statement.
去拍摄案件重现并录下她的证词
Mrs. Helena? Talk about getting the short end of the stick!
海伦娜女士? 还真是踩到雷了你
You wanted the hot teacher and you're stuck with that dog.
本来想搞漂亮老师 结果被安排了老帮菜
Look, just distract her for a bit while I fix the projector here.
投影仪装好之前先转移她注意力
Don't bring her in here! I will figure something out.
别把她带过来 我要处理些事情
I told you your plan was crap!
我都说了你的计划糟透了
Oh, my god! It's happening!
我的天啊 开始了
What the fuck are those bastards doing to my school?
这些混蛋在我的学校搞什么呢?
Son of a bitch!
混账!
I will do it.
我来了
I'm going there myself. Eu vou matar
我亲自动手 我宰了你
Jack, I don't know what you did,
杰克 虽然不知道你怎么搞的
but it kicked ass! I was almost scared!
但是效果太棒了! 我都差点吓到
The old hag is shitting herself!
这老家伙快尿裤子了
I'm taking her to the classroom.
我现在带她去教室
Film me, okay?
来拍我
Just point the camera. I look good from any angle.
对着我拍就行 哥这张脸没有死角
They say bloody Mary's spirit only appears in the bathroom,
他们都说血腥玛丽的灵魂只出现在厕所
but I feel her presence right here.
但我在这里感受到了她的存在
She's in her natural habitat.
她正在自己的地盘上
What was that?
那是什么?
Calm down.
冷静点
Heard that? The noise come from there.
听到了吗? 动静是从这边来的
Come on.
来吧
Don't make a sound. Ghosts dislike certain sounds.
别出声 鬼魂会厌恶特定的声音
Look.
看
It's bloody Mary!
那是血腥玛丽!
This is the first time a TV show witnesses an actual ghost.
第一次有电视节目捕捉到真实鬼魂的镜头
Not counting the other times we did that.
如果不算我们拍到的其他录像
Looks real, doesn't it?
看起来很真实 是不是?
Even the blood.
连血都是
The trick is not showing fear.
诀窍就在于不要露出恐惧
- Did you see that? - I did!
-你看到了吗? -我看到了!
Did you see the footage we just caught?
你看到我们刚刚拍到的画面了吗?
- See how I ain't scared of anything? - I did...
-看到我有多么无所畏惧了吗? -看到了
- Great job, man! - What?
-干得好! 哥们! -什么?
- You rocked in there! - Where?
-你演得棒极了! -哪里?
- That TV deal is in the bag! - What is this joke?
-这部节目肯定能拿下! -你是开玩笑吗?
The lights went out, so I couldn't shave it all.
灯灭了 我没法刮胡子
- Does it look bad? - But why the dress?
-看起来很糟吗? -但你为什么穿裙子?
Don't worry, tulio, I will explain it to her.
别担心图里奥 我会向她解释的
That was tulio back there.
刚才里面的是图里奥
It's called shooting.
这是在拍摄
- When you see a ghost... - Wasn't me.
-只要你看到鬼... -那不是我
- You scream in fear. - I wasn't there.
-就尖叫 -我不在那里
It's going great! It's just what we needed!
一切都非常顺利! 我们就需要这个
You're the one who doesn't understand!
搞不清状况的是你
That thing back there isn't from this world!
刚才那东西不属于这个世界
- It was tulio. - Fred.
-那是图里奥 -弗雷德
I wasn't in that room.
我不在那个房间里
Caroline.
卡洛琳
Always trying to steal the show.
总是想抢戏
Let's do it by ourselves.
我们自己来
It's bloody Mary, not classroom Mary.
这是血腥玛丽 不是学妹玛丽
I just don't understand...
我就不明白了...
Our father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name.
我们在天上的父 愿人都尊你的名为圣
Thy kingdom come, thy will be done...
愿你的国降临 愿你的旨意...
Amen.
阿门
Ouch!
嗷!
- Shit, man... - Let's scram, now!
-很疼的伙计 -我们跑吧
Jack, that was good, but I wasn't recording.
杰克 演得不错 但我没在拍
Do it again, but don't be a ham.
再来一次 但是机灵点
We have to leave, now!
我们现在必须离开!
Maybe we should leave, now.
也许我们是该走了
Learn this, teacher. Running away isn't an option
听着老师 对于打鬼敢死队来说
for a ghoulbuster!
绝对不能逃跑!
Caroline?
卡洛琳?
Back to ruin our thing again?
又来坏我们的好事了?
She botched our shooting downstairs and now's she's back for more.
她搞砸了楼下的拍摄 现在又来了
Haven't you ever heard of teamwork?
你没听过合作吗?
We are a team, but she's always showing off.
我们是个团队 但她总是抢戏
Fine, then. Do your little performance.
好吧 请开始你的表演
I will just record it and edit it out later.
我后期剪辑一下就好了
Hey, tulio. You were a lot better than her.
图里奥 你可比她强多了
It's so fake. She's just trembling!
演的真假 她只是在抖而已
She's possessed by the ghost of Parkinson's disease!
她被得了帕金森的鬼上身了
At least throw up, piss yourself or something.
至少呕吐一下或尿个裤子吧
"Oh, no! I think I'm possessed!
“哦不! 我好像被附身了! ”
Nah, it's just bad acting."
“才怪! 不过是演技不行”
Forget a career in soap operas. Comedy skits at best.
别做肥皂剧的梦了 最多是个喜剧角色
Blood?
这是血?
Did you hear that?
你听到了吗?
This area is like that. When it starts raining,
这一片下雨的时候是会这样
the old pipes get clogged, the turds flow back,
老旧管道堵了 污水就开始回涌
the wiring makes the lights blink, bugs crawl up from gutters, it's hell.
电线泡了水灯一闪一闪的 虫子爬得到处都是
Gross.
恶心死了
If this was a horror movie, now would be time for the first victim to die.
如果这是部恐怖片 应该已经开始死人了
With these guys? I doubt it.
就这几个家伙? 我看不见得
They'd probably make one of those cliché horror movies
他们大概只能拍出那种老套路
where someone suddenly touches somebody's shoulder
突然碰一下肩膀之类的
just for a cheap scare...
就为了来个跳吓...
Where are they? And why aren't you with them?
他们在哪? 你们为什么没跟着?
They told us to wait here.
他们叫我们在这等
- What about conan? - He's probably with them.
-柯南呢? -应该跟他们在一起吧
Geez.
天啊
We've just lost a team member!
我们刚刚失去了一名队员!
Help me open that door!
帮我把门打开!
I can't call anyone!
我没法打电话!
There's no signal!
完全没有信号!
Who you going to call? Ghostbusters?
你要打给谁? 捉鬼敢死队?
You have just opened the gates of hell!
你刚刚打开了通向地狱的大门!
There's got to be another way out!
肯定还有其他出口的!
Enough.
够了
No more shooting in this school.
这里不许再拍了
And I will keep your fee as payment for the lamps you broke.
你们的费用会用来补偿打碎的灯具
Principal, please, go to the hall
校长 求求你 下地狱吧
and see with your own eyes what happened to Caroline.
亲眼看看卡洛琳发生了什么
You must see what happened to her!
您一定得去看看!
Is this Caroline?
这是卡洛琳吗?
No, it was...
不 那是...
This is just a bearded bum wearing a dress.
那只是个穿裙子的胡子大叔
But if he sees himself as Caroline, who am I to disagree?
但是如果他认为自己是卡洛琳 我又能说什么?
I will just have to accept it, otherwise he will sue me because of gender bias.
我只能接受 不然他会告我性别歧视
Caroline? Wake up!
卡洛琳? 醒醒!
Come on! Wake up!
快点! 醒醒!
My friend's head just exploded right there.
我朋友刚刚当场爆炸了
You're telling me one head squirted out all this blood?
你说一颗人头能出这么多血?
- Yeah. - That's right.
-是的 -没错
What a big head.
那还真是颗大头
I always knew they were clowns,
我就知道他们是一群小丑
but you, teacher?
但你呢 老师?
Principal, there really was a body there.
校长 这里刚才真的有尸体
- Please... - It was there!
-行了... -它就在那!
- We got it all on video! - Show him!
-我们都录下来了! -给他看!
- It is recorded. - Watch it!
-都录下来了 -请看!
No more shooting!
再也不许拍了!
Thirty minutes.
半个小时
I want my school squeaky clean in 30 minutes.
半小时内还我一个干净的学校
Thirty minutes to leave my school spotless!
半小时! 我的学校要一尘不染!
Or I will call the police.
不然我就报警
- 0h, god! - Jesus Christ!
-天啊 -上帝啊!
don't know!
我不知道!
Caroline's head exploded! She's dead!
卡洛琳的头爆炸了! 她死了!
Pull yourself together!
给我振作点!
- Bloody Mary. - Where?
-血腥玛丽 -在哪?
I saw her. She's real. She escaped the mirror.
我看到她了 她从镜子里逃出来了
You know me, I tried to stop her, of course...
你知道我的 我试过阻止她
Here's what we should do: Go back to the bathroom where it all began
我们接下来应该回到厕所
and perform the summoning ritual backwards.
把召唤仪式倒过来做一遍
- We got to get out of here, he's raving. - I'm not! Just listen to me this time.
-我们得离开 他疯了 -我没有! 这次就听我的吧
If we do that, she will go back to the world she was in
这样的话她就会离开这里
and leave ours. It's so obvious!
回到她的世界了 这不明摆着的嘛!
That is it!
就是这样!
That is the single dumbest idea I've ever heard.
这是我听过最蠢的主意了
If you had heard it in stranger things,
如果你是在《怪奇物语》里看到的
you would think it was genius.
就会认为这主意棒极了
Hello?
喂?
Yeah, yeah.
是的 是的
"Seven days.”
七天
Cut the crap and wrap it up!
别废话 给我包起来
You've made a mess out of my school!
你把我的学校搞得一团糟
I'm calling a cleaning service tomorrow
我明天要叫清扫人员来
and that will come out of your pocket!
费用从你们的腰包里出!
Enough, sons of the evil!
够了! 恶魔之子!
Spawn of Satan! Go to hell!
撒旦的后裔! 下地狱吧!
I'm going to borrow conan's gun and shoot you right in the face!
我要借来柯南的猎枪打爆你们的臭脸!
We need to get the camera from the principal's office.
我们得拿到校长室里的摄影机
Screw the camera!
别管摄影机了
You work here. Are there other exits?
你是在这工作的 还有其他出口吗?
- There are none! - Let's jump out the window!
-没有了! -我们跳窗吧!
- Bad idea. - Why?
-坏主意 -为什么?
The last kid who tried playing hooky
上一个想要跳窗逃课的孩子
by jumping out the window ended up like this.
最后变成这样了
His ass came up to his neck?
他的屁股从脖子穿出来了?
Are those his testicles hanging from his chest?
他胸前飘扬的是他的蛋蛋?
Yes.
是的
You keep pictures of crippled students?
你手机里存一堆残废学生照片干嘛?
No, people share them over the teachers' chat group.
不是 大家在教师聊天室里发的
- I find it distasteful, too. - I thought it was kind of cool.
-我也觉得很恶心 -我觉得还挺酷的
The secret is to think as if we were in a horror movie.
诀窍就是按恐怖电影的思路来思考
Yeah, right. So everyone dies, except the hot chick.
好的 那么除了美女大家都会死
And we don't even have a hot chick.
我们中甚至没有美女
That's it!
我知道了!
Before they renovated, there was a door that led outside!
在学校翻新之前 有一扇通向外面的门
- Great! - Where?
-太棒了 -在哪?
I don't know! I only started working here after the renovation.
我不知道! 我是翻新结束后才来的
Great. Dungeon master's in the group.
太棒了 地下城主加入群聊
She knows there's an exit, but doesn't know where.
她知道有个出口 但不知道在哪
There's an old floor plan in a cabinet in the principal's office.
校长室的壁橱里有张旧地图
It's our best shot!
这是我们最大的希望了
Perfect. And while we're at it, we grab the camera!
太棒了 我们可以顺道带上摄影机
Oh, man, not blood again!
哦不 怎么又是血
Did principal nogueira just die?
诺圭拉校长是死了吗?
No, I think this room is having its period.
应该是这个办公室来大姨妈了
I sure hope he didn't.
我真希望他没事
Look.
听着
This is real blood.
这些是真血
Bloody Mary's spirit is real!
血腥玛丽的怨灵真实存在
She escaped from the bathroom and now is attacking people!
她逃出了厕所 现在正到处袭击人
We're going to die, and you're shooting a video!
我们都要死了 你还在拍视频!
If we die and people find this, at least I will be famous.
如果这带子在我们死后被找到 至少还能出名
Look for the damn plans!
给我去找图纸!
- Found it! - The floor plans?
-我找到了! -平面图吗?
No, our payment!
不 是我们的报酬
What? Fair is fair.
怎么了? 不拿白不拿
Guys!
大伙!
No matter what happens,
无论发生什么
we simply cannot act like those morons in horror movies
我们决不能像恐怖片里的白痴一样
who split up to find out where the noise came from.
分头寻找动静的来源
That never works! We got to stick together!
这没一次成功的 我们得待在一起!
Guys?
大伙?
Jackson?
杰克逊?
Hey.
嘿
It's the principal.
是校长
I found them! I found the floor plans!
我找到了! 我找到图纸了!
We are saved!
我们得救了!
You.
你
Yeah, you. Pothead.
说你呢 榆木脑袋
Me?
我?
You're going to die
你就要死了
before
就在
Christmas.
圣诞节前
Fred! Help!
弗雷德! 救命!
I'm swallowing HIV here!
我被艾滋病淹没了!
- He's fine! - Is he?
-他没事的 -真的吗?
No!
假的!
Yeah, he's doing great.
他好得很
Jackson! Help me!
杰克逊! 救救我!
He's going to kill me! Save me, Jackson!
他要杀了我! 救我! 杰克逊!
Hey!
嘿!
Hey! He's going to kill me!
嘿! 他要杀我!
Do you think we are going to die?
你认为我们会死吗?
Of course not.
当然不了
I'm this team's leader. I'm not letting anything bad happen to us.
我是领队 我绝不会让坏事发生的
I can't believe this is happening.
我不敢相信居然发生这种事
Me neither!
我也是!
All I just wanted to have my own TV show!
我只想要自己的电视节目!
Fred...
弗雷德...
Why did we have to find a ghost who wants to kill us all?
为什么我们非要招惹想杀了我们的鬼呢?
Couldn't we just have found slimer?
*《捉鬼敢死队》中的黏液鬼
为什么不能找个简单的*Slimer呢?
Or Casper?
*同为《捉鬼敢死队》中的小鬼
*Casper也行啊?
At least he is a friendly ghost.
至少他还是个友好的鬼
Lab
实验室
Somebody help!
救命啊!
Chill out, man.
冷静点 哥们
You're being a little rough.
你有点粗暴了
No!
不要啊!
Go back to hell, bastard!
回地狱去吧! 混蛋!
Go transmit HIV to Satan!
把艾滋传给撒旦吧!
You know, when I was a kid,
你知道在我小时候
I'd never perform the bloody Mary ritual.
我从没试过召唤血腥玛丽
I was too afraid. I mean, I was just a kid.
我太害怕了 我还是个孩子
So much has changed since my days.
现在跟当年比真是变了太多
There's so much I don't do anymore.
很多事我都不再做了
Do you really think we're going to die?
你真的认为我们会死吗?
If this was our last night alive,
如果这是我们最后一晚的话
what would you want to do?
你会想要做什么?
Huh?
嗯?
You're Asian, but you're a redhead?
你一个亚洲人为什么染红毛?
That's fucked up. Where were you born? Hiroshima?
太糟了 你是生在广岛吗?
You chose the worst time to come out of the closet.
你选了个最糟的时机出柜
It's late. You're the only student here.
太晚了 这里的学生就剩你了
- What are you, stupid? - I'm your biggest fan.
-你是傻吗? -我是你们的铁粉
I'm legendary thanos. I comment on all of your videos!
我就是【传奇灭霸】 我给你们所有视频都留了评论
Legendary thanos...
传奇灭霸...
I hate you. If I'd known that, I'd have kicked you in the face instead.
我恨死你了 要知道是你我就一脚踹上去了
- So what's the plan? - Here's the plan, kid.
-所以我们怎么走? -是这样
See? This is the plan.
看到了? 我们就这么走
A nice plan right up your ass.
一路走进你的后庭
The plan is getting out of here!
计划就是要离开这里!
And you're going to let bloody Mary to haunt the bathroom?
就这么放着血腥玛丽在厕所里闹鬼吗?
She ain't in the bathroom anymore. She's loose all over the school.
她不再受困于厕所了 现在全校都是她
Then someone has freed her from the mirror.
那肯定是有人把她从镜子里放出来了
Who could be that dumb?
谁会那么蠢?
Anyway, you always have a plan, don't you?
反正你是有计划的是吗?
Why don't you make one of your weapons?
为什么不做个你那种武器?
It's different now, it's something else. Now tilio isn't the ghost. Just shut up.
现在情况有变...鬼不是图里奥了...闭嘴把你
Who is tulio?
谁是图里奥?
What are you looking for?
你在找什么?
Mom once told me that the library was public back in her days,
妈妈跟我提过她上学时图书馆是开放的
so there must be an exit there!
所以这里一定有个出口
The exit is here. In the library!
出口就在这 在图书馆
I knew it!
我就知道!
I'm just going to ask you a favor.
我要请你帮个忙
Once we leave this room, zip it.
我们离开这间房间之后给我保密
Keep your mouth shut. Do not fidget.
嘴巴闭紧了 不要慌
Clearly you do nothing but screw up.
显然你就会惹麻烦
Didn't I just tell you to be quiet?
我不是刚叫你闭嘴吗?
We're going to the library, but we should find a weapon first.
我们去图书馆之前先找个武器
Had you ever got fucked on school grounds?
你以前在学校做过吗?
Harder!
用力!
So, teacher, am I approved?
老师 我及格了吗?
Harder!
用力!
Enjoying the math table?
喜欢这样的数学课吗?
Harder!
用力!
Go to hell, Fred!
下地狱吧 弗雷德!
Push the locker!
把柜子推倒!
- Do something, kid! - But what?!
-做点什么啊! -做什么?
Whatever, find a wire coat hanger and pills of cytotec!
随便什么 找个铁丝衣架或者避孕药!
Did you see that?
你看到了吗?
The mirror killed the fetus!
镜子把胎儿杀死了!
I'm sure that the mirror bloody Mary came out of
这肯定是血腥玛丽出来的镜子
is the only thing that can hurt her!
是唯一可以伤到她的东西!
Like a silver bullet for werewolves, or garlic for vampires!
就像狼人与银子弹或吸血鬼与大蒜
Gee, man. Was that really necessary?
天啊 这有必要吗?
It was already dead.
它都已经死了
I never want to look at another fetus.
我再也不想看见别的小胎儿了
Bloody Mary... she exists...
血腥玛丽是存在的...
She really does exist.
她真的存在
Do not touch that!
别碰那个!
The hell's this all about?
这又是怎么回事?
knew it!
我就知道!
- Caroline's head exploded... blood... - I'm going to find out what's going on.
-卡洛琳脑袋爆炸了...血... -我要查明白怎么回事
Have you brought a fucking kid to the school at night?
你们大半夜带了个学生来学校吗?
I don't know anything about no kid!
我不知道还有学生
I'm calling the principal.
我要打电话叫校长了
- I'm crapping my pants... - Hello?
-我快吓尿了... -喂?
Did you cut off the school's phone line?
你把学校的电话线掐了?
I'm drenched in blood, and you're worried about the school's phone line, dude!
我浑身都是血了 你还在担心个鬼的电话线!
Bloody Mary is going to kill us all!
血腥玛丽会把我们斩尽杀绝的!
Bloody Mary, huh?
血腥玛丽是吗?
- So she's going to kill us, huh? - Yes!
-她要杀了我们是吗? -是的!
Shut your trap! I'm going to deal with this.
闭嘴吧你! 让我来处理
- You just stay here, nice and quiet... - She's going to kill you!
-你就乖乖待在这里... -她会杀了你的!
Wwhile I deal with this bloody Mary.
等我搞定这个血腥玛丽
Let me go!
放我走!
I'm going to fix this shit.
我要把这烂摊子收拾好
But, first,
但是首先
I got to take care of some more serious shit.
我要去处理一些更紧急的情况
Hey! Get me out of here!
嘿! 放我走啊!
They forgot about us in here.
他们把我们忘了
Didn't they ask us to be part of this joke?
不是他们要我们来参与的吗?
If this was a horror movie, we'd be those meaningless side characters.
如果这是部恐怖片 我们就是那种无意义的龙套
The ones who are just cast to add some extra deaths and blood.
只被用来增添更多的死亡血腥场景
Yeah.
没错
But in those movies, before those characters die,
但是在那些电影里 龙套死掉之前
they're either doing drugs or having sex.
他们不是在嗑药就是在做爱
But I didn't bring any drugs.
但我没带毒来
- Or having sex. - Then I think we will survive.
-那做爱... -我认为我们会活下来的
I will go talk to the principal to see
我去找校长问问
- if we can go home now. - Wait.
-看我们能不能回家了 -等等
We've come this far. We will make it.
都走到这一步了 我们能做到的
What about tulio?
图里奥怎么办?
There's no more tulio. And that's your fault.
图里奥不在了 这都是你的错
You left him behind!
你抛弃了他!
Mrs. Helena had ran off! I had to protect her.
海伦娜女士跑了 我得去保护她
- She was an innocent bystander. - You're lucky I came to save you.
-她只是个无辜的路人 -你该万幸我来救你了
Actually, I found you in the hallway!
事实上 我在走廊里找到你的
The exit must be somewhere around here.
出口一定就在这附近
It's in the library, like I said.
我都说了在图书馆里
As I said, it's in the library!
我都说了在图书馆里!
Just because it has books, doesn't mean it's a library.
不是有书的地方就叫图书馆的
Bloody Mary.
血腥玛丽
Boo!
Rua!
What the fuck is that shit?
这玩意是什么?
Not today, mister poop!
今日非我忌日 屎先生
I need to get out of here.
我得赶紧离开这
We need to get out of here!
我们得赶紧离开这
- We got to leave! - That's what I said when I came in here!
-我们得走了! -我早就跟你说了!
I just fought a poop, man!
我刚跟一条屎决斗来着!
Li noticed the smell!
我闻出来了!
Dude, why do you keep a shotgun in a school?
哥们 你为什么在学校里藏猎枪?
You don't know this school.
你不了解这学校
Yes, I do! It's a regular school!
我了解! 这不就是所普通学校吗
You're right, this is incriminating evidence I'm stashing for my cousin.
你是对的 这是我帮表亲藏的罪证
- As for you... - What?
-至于你... -怎么了?
You talk too much! Come on!
你话太多了! 快走!
I hope your friend is right about the exit being there.
我希望你朋友猜的是对的
He isn't my friend.
他不是我朋友
I hate him.
我恨死他了
- Why? - He's legendary thanos.
-为什么? -他就是传奇灭霸
- What? - Yeah.
-不是吧? -没错
- That kid's a jackass. - No, you're the jackasses!
-那孩子是个混蛋 -你才是混蛋!
- I never thought you'd be such wusses! - Listen, kid.
-我可没想到你是个胆小鬼 -听着 孩子
I've survived a week in the jungle drinking my own urine!
我曾在热带雨林里靠喝尿撑了一个礼拜
Oh, yeah? And what did you eat?
是吗? 那你吃的什么?
Your ass!
吃屁吧你!
- Great. - Do you still think I'm a wuss?
-太棒了 -你还认为我是胆小鬼?
Don't get near her. She's possessed.
别靠近她 她被附身了
What happened to me?
我发生什么了?
- Don't you remember anything? - Anything at all.
-你什么都不记得了? -一点都不记得了
Not even about us?
连我们的事都忘了?
Everything will be all right now. Mrs. Helena is here!
一切都会好了! 海伦娜女士来了
"Everything will be okay now. Mrs. Helena is here.
“一切都会好了 海伦娜女士来了”
Everything will work out."
“一切都会顺利的”
This isn't icarly, you little shit!
这不是青春喜剧 你个小混蛋
Don't mind them, Mrs. Helena. Just a second.
海伦娜女士 别听他的 等一下
Sit down a bit, take deep breaths.
坐下来休息休息
So you don't remember anything?
你什么都不记得了?
I don't.
不记得了
So, what's the plan?
那计划是什么?
What the fuck is that?
那又是什么?
It's torch slipcase. Can't you see it's a condom?
手电保护套 你难道不认识安全套吗?
Have you never seen one before? You fucked that trollop?
-你从没见过吗? -你上了那个老女人?
She was possessed, man. I fucked bloody Mary!
她被附身了 所以我上了血腥玛丽!
- Bloody Mary? - Yeah!
-血腥玛丽? -没错!
A 0-year-old girl?
一个十岁小女孩?
That's child molesting!
你这是猥亵儿童!
She isn't really 0. She's over 00,
她才不是十岁 她都一百多岁了
considering she died last century.
事实上她死于上个世纪
So she's dead. That's necrophilia!
她死了 那就是恋尸癖
No. Bloody Mary was in her very alive body.
并不是 血腥玛丽附在她非常鲜活的身体上
Where am ? Where do I go?
我在哪? 我要去哪里?
Also, if the kid is ten, and we add up the teacher's age,
况且如果孩子十岁 再加上老师的年纪
I fucked a 70-year-old, on average.
我不过上了一个七十岁老人而已
So you fucked Mrs. Helena and bloody Mary at the same time?
那么你同时上了海伦娜女士和血腥玛丽?
- That's right. - Dude.
-没错 -兄弟
Then it was a threesome.
那这就是3P了
Exactly.
正是
You shouldn't even be in this conversation.
你都不应该参与这种谈话
Yeah. Here, throw this away.
没错...拿着 把这个扔了
What a sissy.
真是个废物
So this is it?
就这?
This is my role in the story?
这就是我在剧情里的角色?
To be cast as a minor character,
就这么一个龙套?
end up in some dump,
死在这破地方
and die a grotesque death?
死得荒诞而猎奇?
You bastards!
你们这群混蛋!
Shit!
该死!
Come on.
快点
I'm going to find out what you did.
我会查清楚你们做了什么的
Come on. We're getting out of here.
快点 我们要离开这里
We are getting out of here!
我们一定要离开这里!
Stop eating Caroline!
放下你嘴里的卡洛琳!
You cannibal!
你个食人魔!
Stop it, cannibal! You cannibal!
住手! 你这个食人魔!
What the fuck?
怎么回事?
Do you want to play with me?
你想和我玩吗?
I'm beginning to remember...
我开始记得了...
See this?
看到了吗?
The old exit is somewhere on that wall.
以前的出口就在墙上
- Let's do this. - Wait a second.
-我们动手吧 -等一下
- The exit is here! - Good job, thanos!
-出口在这! -干得好 灭霸!
Of course you knew where it was. You saw it here.
你当然知道在哪 你在地图上看到了
Guys, I felt it...
大伙 我感觉到了...
She's just a little girl,
她还只是个小女孩
upset over bad things that happened to her...
因为自己身上发生的坏事而不开心...
Yeah, she's just a victim, right?
她只是受害者 是吗?
Deep down, she's really nice.
内心深处她还是个好人
She was just helping Caroline clear up her head.
她只是帮卡洛琳理清了“头”续
Students are confused. It is my duty to help them!
有学生陷入困惑 而我有职责帮他们!
So you like helping?
你喜欢帮忙吗?
Then help them push that bookshelf so we can get out of here!
那就来帮他们推开书架我们好跑路!
Come on, now.
加把劲
It's blocked.
已经封住了
Record this to me.
帮我录一下
Don't try this at home.
在家不要轻易尝试
Are you stupid?
你傻逼吗?
Did you really think you could tear down that wall with a flying kick?
你真以为一记飞踢就能把墙踹开?
There is no way out. You will have to face bloody Mary.
没有出路了 你们必须直面血腥玛丽
Or help her.
或者帮助她
For a teacher and an Asian kid, you guys are pretty dumb.
对于一名老师和一个亚洲小孩来说 你们可真蠢
Haven't you realized that we're not paranormal hunters?
你们还没意识到我们不是什么超自然猎手吗?
We can't face ghosts.
我们打不过鬼魂
We're just freeloaders following the YouTube trend
我们只是跟着油管潮流的混混
so we don't have to get real jobs.
这样就不用找正经工作了
Who told you to film that, kid?
谁让你录这段的?
Before doing this, I've tried getting into big brother,
在做这行之前我试过做公务员
being a dj, doing stand-up comedy. I've even been a pro MMA fighter!
当DJ 做喜剧演员 我甚至做过专业MMA选手!
No, that's a lie. You've never been a pro MMA fighter.
不对 你没当过MMA选手
And if you did,
即使你当过
catarina would kick your ass.
卡特琳娜也能揍翻你
Catarina? Who's catarina?
卡特琳娜? 谁是卡特琳娜?
Bloody Mary's real name.
那是血腥玛丽的真名
How come you know that?
你怎么会知道这个?
Everybody uses "bloody Mary" when they summon her,
所有人都用“血腥玛丽”来召唤她
but not me.
但我没有
I performed properly the ritual. That's why she showed up.
我施展了正确的仪式 所以她现身了
You performed "properly" the ritual, huh?
你施展了“正确”的仪式是吗?
Where did you find this?
你在哪找到的这个?
Wait, man!
等等! 兄弟!
Stay back! I'm armed!
退后! 我有武器!
And then the ox came and fell on top of me!
结果公牛冲过来压在了我的身上!
How could I escape? Oxen are heavy!
我要怎么逃脱? 那公牛沉死了
So I balled up my screwdriver like this,
于是我把螺丝刀这样握着
I pierced its hide between its third and fifth ribs,
从它第三和第五根肋骨之间刺穿了牛皮
and made my way through him by ripping out his guts.
一路掏心掏肺地刨了出去
I went through to the other side!
于是我从另一边爬出来了!
What does it say here?
这上怎么说的?
Do you always come here to read old newspapers and summon ghosts?
你是经常来这翻翻旧报纸招招魂吗?
No. Actually, I came to see this.
没有 我其实是来看这个的
- Why don't you look up porn on the net? - Mom's Christian, she's blocked xvideos.
-你为什么不上网看? -我妈是基督徒 把黄片都屏蔽了
This is why you were always going on about Caroline's boobs in the comments.
所以你才总在评论里关注卡洛琳的胸
Shall we try and do something useful around here?
我们能不能整点有用的?
Maybe there's something here that might help us.
这里可能有能帮到我们的内容
You left me behind to die.
你扔下我等死
What?
你说什么?
Wait, tulio, killing friends isn't going to solve problems.
等等图里奥 杀死朋友不能解决任何问题
Friends?
朋友?
My friends were going for the exit and leaving me?
我的朋友会丢下我自己去找出口?
I'd never leave you behind! I was going to come back with the police!
我从未扔下你! 我是要带警察回来的
And what would the police do? Handcuff the ghost?
警察又能做什么? 把鬼铐起来?
Shoot it in the head?
还是一枪爆头?
Bullets go through bloody Mary's body, moron!
子弹打不到血腥玛丽 白痴!
I saw it with my own eyes!
我亲眼看见的!
But I think this bullet can kill me a douchebag.
但是我认为这发子弹可以打死一个混蛋
I only have one. And I'm thinking of using it on you.
我只有一发 现在打算用在你们身上
- Just to try it out. - Calm down, tulio.
-试试手感如何 -冷静 图里奥
This isn't what you're thinking we're so close to putting an end to...
这不是你想的那样 我们就快解决...
By leaving me behind to die, right? That is it!
就扔下我等死吗? 够了!
You have no idea what I went through to get here.
你无法想象我经历了什么才站在这里
I've had to rip my way through the guts of a huge ox
我从一头巨牛的内脏里一路刨出来
with my own hands.
用我的双手
His shoe size was 5.
他的鞋码只有五号
Turn that shit down!
把那玩意关了!
Dude, we can use what's here to become rich!
哥们 我们可以靠这些录像暴富
It's going to change our lives!
这会改变我们的人生!
So now I'm good enough to be on camera, huh?
现在我可以出镜了是吗?
Actually, right now we want you on our team! Right?
事实上 我们希望你加入这个团队!
Yeah!
没错!
- That's right! - Exactly!
-没错! -是的!
Because you're talking like a real ghoulbuster.
因为你现在像个真正的打鬼敢死队员了
- Yeah! - That's right, man.
-没错 -就是这样 哥们
Will I have my own uniform?
我能有自己的制服了?
- Of course! - The nicest uniform!
-当然了! -最棒的制服!
And I will never have to dress like a ghost again?
我再也不用扮鬼了?
- No. - No way.
-不 -绝不
That was bad taste.
那样太没品了
I never agreed to that. It was Caroline's idea.
我从没赞成过 都是卡洛琳的主意
You're going to be on camera, tulio.
你要上镜了 图里奥
You will have your own uniform with the ghoulbusters logo.
你会穿着带LOGO的专属制服
Shut up!
闭嘴!
That name sucks!
那个名字烂透了!
It sounds like a ghostbusters cheap ripoff.
听起来就像山寨的捉鬼敢死队
And that logo, too! It was drawn by a one-handed nincompoop.
还有那个残废白痴画的LOGO
But it was me.
但那是我画的
We're going to change it. It will be the logo I designed
我们要换掉 要用我设计的LOGO
and you guys just ignored.
你们一直无视我
- I have it here with me. - No, no! Dude!
-我一直带着呢 -兄弟不要这样
- Did you stick it up your ass? - There's a kid here!
-你是藏到菊花里了吗? -别当着孩子面这样
- Stop this, please. - Hold on, it's kind of stuck.
-别弄了 -稍等 有点卡住了
I'm too young for this.
我还受不了这个
Here it is! The logo we will be using from now on!
在这! 从此就要用这个LOGO
Put it on your uniforms. Now!
都贴到制服上! 快点!
I'm sorry, but is this a ghost with a club?
抱歉 这是个拿着棒子的鬼魂吗?
This logo empowers the ghosts. We're the ones who should look strong.
这个LOGO让鬼更猖狂了 应该是我们看起来更霸气
- It's better than the shit you drew. - It's like using a chicken in a kfc logo.
-比你画的垃圾强多了 -简直是肯德基拿鸡做商标
Kfc sells butchered, slaughtered chickens and there's a happy one on the box.
肯德基每天都卖屠杀肢解的鸡 但是包装上还要画只开心的鸡
- It just doesn't make sense. - Put it on!
-这简直说不通 -贴上!
Paste it on already!
都贴好了!
Li can't make it stick!
这也不黏啊
Use the blood and pus oozing from his ear!
用他耳朵里冒出来的血和脓!
It's human glue. Glue it on!
这是纯天然人胶 贴上!
And I want to be credited as "necro-spectral sniper ceo".
我要我的名号是“死灵狙击手西奥”
- That position doesn't even exist... - Yes, it does!
-不存在这种名号... -存在的!
It does, man. He fought very hard to get to it.
存在的 他非常努力才争取来的
You know what? On second thought, I want to be the team's leader.
我转念一想 我想要当领队
No, you can't.
不 你不行
Whatever you are, you've created the coolest logo
你已经创作了最棒的LOGO
and an awesome name!
又起了酷炫的名字
Who's this kid who sounds like he's in some ad?
这个浮夸的孩子是谁?
He's legendarythanos.
他就是传奇灭霸
I hate legendarythanos!
我恨传奇灭霸!
- Me too. - No!
-我也是 -不!
- Then shoot him. - What the fuck?
-那就开枪 -你说什么?
I only have one bullet. Aim for his head!
-我只有一发子弹 -那就瞄他的脑袋!
- Stand still, kid! - Don't do this!
-别动 孩子 -别这样!
- Do it! - No!
-开枪! -不!
I can't.
我不行
I'm a ghost killer. I don't kill the living, only the dead.
我是个鬼魂杀手 我不杀活人
- Give me that. - And... cut!
-把它给我 -卡!
I get it. You knew he wouldn't have the guts to shoot me
我懂了 你知道他没胆量开枪打我
so you used that to take the shotgun away from him!
你借此把猎枪从他那里夺过来了
Yeah, that's right. I had it planned all along.
没错 我一直都是这么计划的
Hey! As the new leader, I say what we will do next!
作为新的领队 我来决定接下来做什么!
Go back to the bathroom and perform the ritual backwards.
回到厕所去把仪式倒着做一遍
Shut up. We're discussing serious stuff here.
闭嘴 我们这说正事呢
Where's the newspaper? Here it is.
-报纸哪去了? -在这
"During the 975 school fair,
在1975年的学校事件中
undertaker José mojica
负责人何西·莫西卡
claims to have talked to the ghost of a blonde girl
声称在学校厕所的镜子里
through the school bathroom's mirror.
与一名金发女孩的鬼魂交谈过
The following words are those of catarina,
以下是金发女鬼卡特琳娜
the blonde ghost...
所说的原话...
"I was 3 years old when I got transferred to a new school.
“我被转到新学校时只有13岁”
I was afraid I wouldn't be accepted.
“我怕自己不被他人接受”
Worried about what other people would think of me..."
“担心别人对我的看法...”
Who would like to read?
谁愿意读一下?
- Catarina. - The milky way...
-卡特琳娜 -银河...
"But I never imagined I'd have such a warm welcome.
“但我从未想到能得到这样暖心的欢迎”
All the girls wanted to be like me.
所有女孩子都想和我一样
Those ended up being the best days of my life.
那些是我生命中最美好的日子
Everything would've been perfect, if it wasn't
本来一切都是那么的完美
for the envy of some girls.
都怪那几个嫉妒的女孩
School is the most cruel environment there is
学校对于成长中的孩子来说
for a developing child.
是最残忍的环境
I'd never thought my good looks
我从未想到自己的美貌
could awake such horrid feelings in other people.
会唤起他人心中如此丑恶的一面
- Catarina... - No, please!
-卡特琳娜... -求你别这样!
The girls said I stole attention away from them.
女孩们怪我夺走了属于她们的注意力
- Don't mess with us. - Catarina.
-别惹我们 -卡特琳娜
They said horrible things to me."
他们对我恶言相向
Catarina!
卡特琳娜!
"And humiliated me as brutally as they could.
并且尽他们所能地羞辱着我
That's what you get for messing with us!
这就是招惹我们的下场!
I couldn't handle looking at myself again after what happened.
在这之后我都无法面对自己
So I decided to leave.
于是我决定离开
Forever...
永远离开...
Good god.
天啊
Such cruelty!
太残忍了!
I agree. We need to destroy that ghost!
我同意 我们得把鬼魂消灭掉!
Stop this! Didn't you hear what I just read?
住手! 你没听见我刚说的吗?
That girl is a victim of the society of the living!
这个女孩是活人世界的受害者!
All she wants is retribution!
她只是想得到报应
And that's what we're going to give her!
我们就是要帮她达成心愿!
Retribution for...
报应...
What?
什么呢?
From what I've gathered, last time she threw a fit, she tried to kill you.
- She was possessed! - She might be now, too!
-她当时被附体了! -她现在可能也是呢!
Her head wasn't spinning!
她的头没有反过来!
Right.
说得真对
I see how it is. You're going to defend your girlfriend.
我看明白了 你想给自己的女朋友撑腰
Is she your girlfriend?
她是你女朋友?
Of course not!
当然不是!
We were stuck together in an extreme situation, so...
我们当时被困在极端情况 所以...
I got stuck with that kid, too, but I didn't think about fucking him.
我也跟这小孩困住了 我也没想睡他啊
Lost your chance.
那你没把握好机会
So, as the leader, I will tell you all what to do.
作为领队 由我来指挥你们
We will focus on getting out of here!
我们要专注于逃出这里!
Your plan being? Perform the ritual...
-那您的计划是? -把仪式倒着...
I know! How about burning the school down?
我知道了! 咱放把火把这烧了吧?
- Who could survive fire? - A ghost, maybe?
-谁能逃得过火烧? -鬼就可以吧?
Can't you all just shut up? Here's what we will do.
你们能不能都闭嘴! 我们得这样
We will throw the kid outside, and while bloody Mary eats him,
我们把这小孩扔出去 在血腥玛丽吃掉他时
we hide and wait for the people who can actually bust ghosts.
我们躲起来等待真正会捉鬼的人来
- Aren't we those people? - Just shut up!
-不就我们会捉鬼吗? -闭嘴吧!
- I have a plan. - Oh yeah?
-我有个计划 -哦是吗?
Let's hear it.
让我们听听
You want to know what my plan is? This is the plan!
你想知道我怎么打算的吗? 听好了
Right in your face! Here's your plan!
去你的吧! 这就是打算!
You don't deserve to wear this.
你不配戴着这个
You will never be ghost killers!
你们永远当不成打鬼敢死队员!
Unfortunately, I can't shoot ghosts in the face...
不幸的是 我不能开枪打到鬼魂...
Bullets go through bloody Mary's body!
子弹会穿过血腥玛丽的身体
The mirror's the only thing that can stop her.
只有那面镜子能阻止她
- I have only one bullet. - I can hit anything at any range.
-只有一发子弹 -我能在任何范围内击中任何目标
We will show the world that ghosts have to be hunted.
我们将昭告世界：那只鬼必须解决掉
I have a plan!
我有计划了!
- I will do what I do best. - Play smartass and ruin everything?
-我要玩我的绝活 -装聪明然后搞砸吗?
- Cry like a baby? - Owe my uncle rent?
-吓得哭出来? -欠我叔叔钱?
No! I will do what Caroline told us to do from the get-go.
不! 我要按卡洛琳说的从头来做
- What? - I will build a weapon.
-做什么? -我要做一把武器
She didn't say that.
她可没说这个
- She talked about being friends... - Shut up!
-她说过做朋友... -闭嘴!
We will need the only item that can kill bloody Mary.
我们需要唯一能杀死血腥玛丽的东西
The mirror she came out of. I had a shard of it, but I lost it.
就是她穿过的那面镜子 我有一块碎片但是弄丢了
- We must risk our lives to get it. - You mean this shard?
-必须冒生命风险拿到它 -你是说这块吗?
Who said you could keep that? It ain't yours.
谁允许你揣着的? 这不是你的东西
Got some pliers there?
有钳子什么的吗?
- The toolbox is in the bathroom. - Then off we go.
-工具箱在厕所里 -那就走吧
Hold on.
等一下
Before we do that, ll will also do what I do best.
开始之前 我也要玩把绝活
People have always said we faked our ghosts.
人们总说我们的鬼是假的
They've always been real, but this time, more so!
鬼一直都是真的 但这次更绝了!
And now it's personal.
现在这是私人恩怨了
You can blow as many heads as you want,
你可以尽情索命
because we won't give up!
但我们是不会放弃的!
We are the ghost killers!
我们是打鬼敢死队!
No, you're not.
你才不是呢
Ghost, we're coming to exterminate you.
鬼魂 我们来消灭你了
This is so cool! I'm flying!
太酷了! 我飞起来了!
Don't panic! I'm here with you!
别慌! 有我在呢!
And I won't leave you behind! We're more than family!
我不会丢下你的! 我们之间胜过亲情!
We're a team!
我们是队友!
We will stick together to the very end!
我们会并肩作战到最后一刻!
It's the exit!
出口在那!
Let's get out of this school!
我们快离开这所学校!
You can't leave! You're in remedial class!
你们不能走! 你们被留堂了!
Fred, help!
弗雷德! 救命!
Fred!
弗雷德!
Help!
救命啊!
He's going to be fine!
他会没事的!
I'm going to kill you and your friend!
我会把你和你的朋友杀光!
You will die like a weakling!
你会死得像个弱鸡!
She's possessing me...
她要上我的身了...
Kill him! Kill your friend!
杀了他! 杀了你的朋友!
She took me over! Kill me before I kill you!
她控制住我了! 在我动手之前杀了我!
I won't kill him! I want to see you killing him!
我不会杀他! 我想看着你把他杀死!
Get out of my friend!
从我朋友身体里滚出去!
Yes!
就是这样!
- Shoot! - It's our only chance!
-该死! -这是我们唯一的机会!
I'm possessed, man! Save yourself!
我被附体了! 你们自救吧!
One of us has to die!
我们之中必须死一个!
Kill him! Give what's coming to him!
杀了他! 让他的报应实现!
Before I kill you!
趁我还没杀死你!
Save yourself, Jackson! I'm doomed!
保全你自己吧杰克逊! 我完蛋了!
- Shoot! - Kill him!
-该死的! -杀了他!
Go ahead and kill me. I've lost too many friends today.
杀了我吧 我今天失去太多朋友了
How cute! You're a hero!
真可爱 你还想逞英雄
Wish I had a cool one-liner for this situation.
要是能想出一句酷炫的台词该多好
Recess is almost over,
课间休息快结束了
and I'm the hall inspector who's going to...
现在 纪律委员要来...
No use pushing me around...
欺负我是没用的...
Aren't you tired of getting your ass kicked by a little girl?
被一个小女孩吊打这么久你不累吗?
He got his ass kicked by a fetus, too.
他还被一个小婴儿吊打来着
Shut up.
闭嘴
I call this baby here
来见见这个大宝贝
a nice round of fucking your face!
美美地骑你一脸!
Recess is over, bitch.
休息结束了 贱人
Eat this...
吃我...
Jackass!
一炮!
Somebody help me, please!
有人能救救我吗!
It hurts!
我好痛!
- Please! - I will help you.
-求求你! -我来帮你
Don't be afraid. I'm going to help you, dear.
别害怕 我来帮你了亲爱的
I'm here to help.
我来帮你了
The mirror materialized her.
镜子让她实体化了
See what you almost did?
看见你干的好事了吗?
You almost destroyed this poor child's soul.
你差点毁灭了这个孩子的灵魂!
You monster!
你个禽兽!
Who'd like to read?
谁愿意读一下?
The milky way is one of the...
银河是最...
She's a victim!
她是个受害者!
Now you will see!
现在你知道了!
Sometimes someone evil
有时候邪恶的人
is just someone evil.
就是天生邪恶
A great leader runs away from nothing,
伟大的领袖不会逃避任何事
doesn't leave his people behind
不会背叛他的人民
and kills those who oppose him!
而且会干掉他的敌人!
Welcome back to hell, Fred.
欢迎回到地狱 弗雷德
I couldn't go away without filming this!
我不能没拍完就走掉
At least someone will make money by selling it to faces of death!
至少还有人能卖了这个赚钱
"Aniratac".
“娜琳特卡”
"Aniratac".
“娜琳特卡”
"Aniratac".
“娜琳特卡”
See? Told you! I was right all along!
看见没有? 我一直都是对的!
It was the ritual backwards!
就是把仪式倒过来!
This movie should be 20 minutes long! We could all be in bed by now!
这部电影本来二十分钟就可以洗洗睡了!
Is that Caroline's uniform?
那是卡洛琳的制服吗?
I couldn't save the world not wearing a hero outfit.
我不能没穿上制服就拯救世界
And if we survive, I will want a male uniform.
如果我们活下来 我要一套男款
This one kind of chafes my nads.
这件有点磨档
Not comfortable.
不是很舒服
- Fine by me. - Agreed.
-我没意见 -同意
Jackson!
杰克逊!
She has to look in the mirror!
她必须看向镜子!
Get me a crowbar, tulio!
图里奥! 给我拿跟撬棍!
Here you go!
给你!
- Do it! - Hold her down!
-快动手! -制住她!
Fred, go!
弗雷德! 快!
That was awesome!
这可太酷了!
We exterminated bloody Mary!
我们干掉了血腥玛丽!
We did it!
我们成功了!
Told you it was a 40-grand job.
跟你说了这活得四万块
Now that I've helped you and that I'm part of the team,
现在我帮过忙也成为队员了
I think we should give an official statement...
我们该给出一则正式声明
Shut up, kid. You're not part of the team.
闭嘴 小孩 你才不是队员
"Official statement” my ass.
去它的正式声明
Go away. You're ruining our moment.
快走开 你耽误我们亮相了
Folks, we'd like to give an official statement.
大伙 我们要发布一则正式声明
The ghost killers
打鬼敢死队
have exterminated bloody Mary!
已经消灭了血腥玛丽!
Unfortunately, in the process,
不幸的是在过程中
some teachers and the principal have lost their lives.
痛失了几位教师和校长
Easy, now.
别闹了
The school's saved, and classes will be resumed today!
学校得救了 今天就能复课!
Learn this, now that you're going to be on camera with us.
既然你要跟我们一起上镜就学着点
You will never please everyone.
你永远无法让所有人满意
- And take off that awful wig. - I had that on all the time?
-还有把那假发摘了 -我一直都戴着呢?
You know what? The most important thing is that we're alive.
行吧 最重要的是我们还活着
Yeah, but there is one thing that will be hard to overcome.
但是有一件事实会很难以接受
Yeah, Caroline's death.
是的 卡洛琳死了
No.
不是
Losing our show.
是节目吹了
The footage. It's all gone.
那些录像都没了
Maybe not.
也不一定
Look what I got!
看我拿到什么了!
Before I left, I took the footage from the school's security cameras.
我走之前把学校的监控录像带走了
Way to go, tulio!
图里奥! 干得好!
Now I want to see what TV station won't buy our show!
现在我倒要看看哪个电视台不想买!
Eat this, jackass!
吃我一炮!
To return bloody Mary to the mirror,
想要让血腥玛丽回到镜子里
you just had to perform the ritual backwards.
只需要把仪式倒着做一遍
If I'd seen that in a movie, I'd have found it ridiculous!
如果出现在电影里 我会觉得荒唐!
Seems to be lazy screenwriting.
看着像编剧在偷懒
If you saw it in stranger things, you'd think it was genius.
如果在《怪奇物语》里看到就会觉得妙了
How about ultraje a rigor writing a theme song for the ghost killers?
不如帮我们写一首打鬼敢死队主题曲?
I'd never work with someone like you.
我从未和你们这种人合作过
You can't smoke in here!
你不能在这抽烟!
This isn't your show!
这不是你的节目
You piece of shit.
你个混蛋
Then I took a knife and buried it in that kid's face!
然后我一把刀插进了那小孩的脸!
So I took a shotgun, looked at her in the eyes,
然后我拿起一把猎枪 直视她的眼睛
and said, "eat this, jackass!"
说道：“ 吃 我 一 炮 ”
How rude! How can you say such an absurd in here?
太粗鲁了! 怎么能在这里爆粗?
You can't smoke in here. This is television.
这是电视节目 你不能抽烟
Let's give it up for the heroes who saved this boy!
让我们欢迎救下这个男孩的英雄们!
The only thing more haunting than the ghosts is their acting.
比鬼更让人恐怖的是他们的演技
Okay, okay. Fred, from the ghost killers,
号外! 号外! 打鬼敢死队的弗雷德
is seen leaving a party
被目击与一名热辣的高龄女士
with a hot old lady!
一同离开派对
So you're ghost hunters. You fought ghouls.
你们是鬼魂猎人 你们对抗不死者
You fought bloody Mary!
你们对战了血腥玛丽!
For that you're getting a "hurrah!"
为这个也要向你们欢呼!
A "yeah, yeah", and a "cluck cluck".
再来! 再来!
打鬼敢死队接到新委托!
他们击败了白衣女子/恶灵/被附身的牧羊人...
Go!
开始!
"Ghoul" and "ghost" mean the same thing!
“恶鬼”和“鬼魂”都是一个意思!
Wrong answer! Pie in the face!
回答错误! 热派糊脸!
See that? That's my nephew and his friends!
看到了吗? 那是我侄子和他的朋友!
Wonderful. They started in that backroom!
他们就是在店的后屋起家的!
I gave them full support. Always helped them.
我全心全意支持他们 经常伸出援手
Look at all their success! And it's all thanks to me!
看看他们的成功! 都要感谢我!
This is great. Thanks for buying here.
这太棒了 谢谢惠顾
The ghost killers are under investigation...
打鬼敢死队接受调查...
For school murders.
起因为校园谋杀
That takes the cake!
这可太糟了!
Blaming ghosts for crimes!
栽赃给鬼魂!
The government has verified that the footage is fake.
政府有关部门已证实录像系伪造
The scourge of society!
真是社会的毒瘤!
The case is under investigation.
整个案件正在调查中
The ghost killers will be indicted for homicide.
打鬼敢死队将面临谋杀指控
Those three have never been here, and I've disowned my nephew!
这三个人没来过这! 我也没这个侄子!
Good day to you!
祝您日安!